“‘Relax,” said the nightmare, ‘We are programmed to receive.’”
- misheard lyrics to The Eagles’ “ Hotel California ” (which I always thought made for cooler lyrics)
On my way back from the library Monday, I realized I needed to answer to answer the questions I’d posed at the end of the previous post. I hadn’t originally planned to go through the introductory exercise. One rarely ducks back to do warm-up exercises in the midst of a workout (intellectual or otherwise), but I realized it’s important to find common ground before proceeding.
If we can’t agree on the basic terms from the start, it will become steadily more difficult to communicate. Deferent definitions breed different expectations.
Also when you had the dark and dismal surroundings I had going back after sunset, for downtown Jefferson City makes a bumpy transition from the business section to industrial lots and eventually residential plots. When you have a bat swoop only a few feet over your head, it’s easier to conjure the moodier mindset needed to quantify the various things that go bump.
One other distinction before we start listing. There is a difference between rational and frenzied fears. Some fears we have are illogical quirks; silly but intense beliefs that won’t be eased by common sense or other rationale. Some people find a certain color or number unlucky. Some have a bizarre fear of __fill_in_blank_with_a_common_item__. And one should remember that one person’s nonsensical conviction may be a solid, proved principle for another. Those who have had their stomach pumped have reason to be pickier about sanitary conditions around food. If you ever had a snake curl around the wheel of your tricycle when you were five, like me, you’re going to be a bit skittish around serpentine shapes for a couple decades.
It can be easy to poke fun at fickle fears, but I’m making it a point to concentrate on mainstream ideas that cost people sleep at night: fears that are consciously weighed and considered. One again, we must grant a difference in permission for one man’s philosophy is another’s folly, but I believe these disparities further illustrate the chaotic patchwork that comprises the State of Fear we are trying to examine.
So let’s briefly crack open Pandora’s boxes and see what comes flying out…
What am I been afraid of (past and present tense)?
the Dark (and what hides in it)
War (I remember back in 3rd grade asking my parents if Iraq’s Scud missiles could hit the U.S.)
the Deaths of those close to me
Demons and the devil
God (more specifically a vengeful, spurned God)
Personal persecution (due to religion, political views, morals, etc.)
Car accidents and life as an invalid (Spending an afternoon in a neck brace will do that to you)
Disappointing the people around me
Inaction that will cause others to suffer needlessly
People who abuse the power they are given
What is society afraid of?
Death
Losing affluence
Failure
That which is different
Those who challenge the status quo (and ask people to change)
The last question, ”Where do the lists start breaking down?” is more an essay question so we’ll skip enumerating this category.
Most of my fears fit into sub-categories of society’s concerns. The retort “Politics is personal!” is also accurate when it comes to perspective. I may find fault in a leader that others idolize, or versa vice, or maybe we’ll hate (or love) the same person for different reasons.
Sometimes you can do all the above simultaneously. I’m specifically thinking of my current relationship with God. Right now, I’m going down a road I haven’t traveled before. I’ve getting bumped and bruised by the pounding of questions that haven’t plagued me like this since my first year of college when I was asking, “Who did I want to be?” The tricky thing is that question is never completely answered in this world. Every day you have the opportunity to revisit and revise your answer. There are times when I appreciate God’s guidance (which sometimes involves painful discipline) and there are other times when I am afraid of the path I am taking and other times when I’m afraid I’ve wandered completely away.
The key lesson I learned back then, and still hold to now, is that asking questions are important. I believe the answers are out there for those who search. If you don’t investigate you’ll never find out anything.
Fear can influence you, but indirectly. I am not merely defined by what I am have been afraid of (snakes, the pink elephant hallucination from the movie Dumbo, alienating friends when I share my convictions). I am more often shaped by how I respond to my fear.
Scared people have done some very brave things and their actions earned them accolades more than their feelings. Nightmares shouldn’t stop us from dreaming; fears shouldn’t stop us from living.
Homework for today: Think about how fear has impacted you, specifically, what did you did in response to the fear.
