I thought I’d include the following e-mail as a proper example of the previously mentioned phenomenon, to demonstrate my point. Also, I considering that I only get to use the internet at two hours a pop at the public library, this is a not-so-naked attempt to get the maximum mileage out of my scribblings.
“Selection taken from the closing of an e-mail:”
I'm quite sure that I will see you again in this lifetime … so I will not say farewell. Until we meet again - you can always call/e-mail me!
xoxoxoxo (just because you'd find that inappropriate)
- Note: Name deleted to protect the flippant
Dear Flippant,
Quick question:
How is "xoxoxoxo" inappropriate? Is this new short hand for some sort of inappropriate act I am not familiar with?
As you might expect, "xoxoxoxo" does remind me of an anecdote...
Back in high school, there was a day when the family car was tied up and I was forced to revert to the public school bus to get home.
Out of habit, I sat in the middle of the bus (since I'd never had enough verve to fight for the back-of-the-bus seat, and those three-foot-tall and under are the ones who sit in the front). I had the pleasure of watching two kids try to decipher a love note.
At most, the kids were in fourth grade, though I'd peg them closer to second or third based on the questions they asked. One had received a card from a girl and his friend was translating it for him.
I believe I had to work very hard to keep from snickering too loudly as they tried to probe the depth of the feminine mind. The best part was when they came to the post script:
"Oh... It says 'Xs and Os' at the end."
"What does that mean?"
"It means hugs and kisses."
"Oh my God!"
My stop was fast approaching, and I felt this was a good time to give the two kids a valuable lesson.
I leaned forward and said, “Enjoy it now, kids. It only gets harder from here on out," and I got off the bus.
I wished someone would have approached me at the age of 9, 10 and told me how things were only going to get much more complicated as time went on when it came to relationships. I'm sure they didn't understand it at the time, but I sometimes wonder if those two kids ever looked back and gave thanks for the sage words that stranger gave to them a long time ago.
Or maybe they totally forgot, the thankless wretches...
- Caleb
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If this is too cheesy to keep up, let me know and I'll discontinue the practice. If you think this re-telling was noteworthy, and think others may appreciate it, let me know.
It's human nature to repeat a joke in front of others absent from the first telling in the hopes of replicating laughs (or possibly improving upon the timing, making one look sharper and more witty). I'm simply doing the same practice in a smaller space, so I must admit the joke is, as my flippant friend put it, "lather, rinsed, and repeated."
I'm not the only one that does this... right?
I'd better go now...
