“Clean shirt, new shoes. And I don't know where I am goin' to.”
Lately I’ve felt like a Mattel Middle-Manager Ken® Doll.
My wardrobe has greatly expanded recently. This is due to two facts. First, working a copyediting job where I oversee some people will require me to dress in nicer clothes than I normally gird myself. Second, most of the clothes I own (even those that would be appropriate for this new level) are in storage units spread throughout the state of Missouri; especially my thicker winter ensemble which was one of the things first boxed up in May. Those boxes are now “safely” secured at the back of a very well filled storage shed. No hyperbole, we’d have to remove two-thirds of the contents to gain access to them. Until my parents rent a moving truck, they’re not going anywhere.
This isn’t the first time I had to upgrade my attire. Back when I first started working for the Columbia Missourian as a reporter, I suddenly had to stick to a printed employee dress code. Previous jobs had largely skipped this requirement.
The Wal-Mart Lawn & Garden bosses didn’t care what you wore as long as your green vest sat on top of it. I don’t remember the Missouri Department of Conservation giving me specific dressing pointers, though the job itself typically pushed me to wear something that would act as an extra barrier between bugs, nettles, and thorns. Being a desk attendant at the University of Missouri was simple, clothing wise. As long as you showed up bearing clothes, you were good. Pajamas were even acceptable, especially if you were opening in the morning (though you could frequently spot pajamas on those who covered the desk any time during weekends).
Becoming a representative for the Columbia Missourian, as the handbook put it, required some extra efforts on my part. Wearing dress pants and shirts with collars outside church services was new to me. I’d been infamous for arrival at the Honor’s College yearly formal in a Hawaiian shirt, shorts, sandals, and all the Mardi Gras beads I could scrape together. The student advisors hesitated slightly before allowing me to enter, but once in I was the most comfortably dressed one there. I won that round, but knew the Missourian editors would be less likely to bend their policies.
So I got more dress shirts, polo shirts, respectable stuff. I made sure I had black socks and shoes when I covered higher profile stories. One day I realized my collection of t-shirts were finally outnumbered by the sweaters, buttoned down shirts, polos, and other more formal clothing. My closet was maturing before my eyes.
I still slipped some quirks in, especially when I moved to the copy desk (where I got less scrutiny clothing-wise). I wore sandals more often or just plain kicked my shoes off and would slide around the newsroom. The Hawaiian shirts made a comeback; I especially like wearing them in colder times when most people let their colors go more drab.
Of course, I’m taking another step up. My habit of wearing extra large shirts on my medium frame won’t look as professional. Holey blue jeans won’t be kosher. Dropping by, however briefly, in shorts and a t-shirt won’t reflect well on me. It’s the end of an era.
And so, I have found myself in countless discount shopping centers trying stuff on, looking to see if it fits my shoulders, checking the zippers and buttons, and trying to coordinate color combinations. I think I now possess more dress pants than all the previous number of dress pants I’ve owned combined (though this is also due to the fact I’ve downgraded many nice pair of pants by playing too hard after church services and getting them grass stained or ripped climbing around 20 feet of the ground).
It’s a weird transition for me to go through. Some milestones are greeted with bigger fanfare. Congrats, you can drive! Good job, you graduated! Gadzooks, you’re paying taxes because you have a job!
The stepping stone of dressing nicer due to the responsibility of a higher tier job may not be as well known, but it certainly signals another step forward… in shoes and socks that match my jacket and my tie.
A tie, a tie… My kingdom includes a tie!
It is certainly a brave new world, and I haven’t even started working yet. It’s going to be an informative year.
“'Cause every girl crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man”
