WAG - We're laughing because this is a joke, right?
Ever make a comment to another person about a subject that you do not know personally applies to that person until after you drop the punch line?
My church had a real treat this evening. The long awaited birth of the youth pastor and his wife’s child came last Monday. It is a real family affair for the church since not only are the parents related to a mentionable portion of the congregation, but the youth pastor’s wife is also the daughter of the pastor.
Stepping over the trick branches of the family tree that snake through the church, tonight was Youth Appreciation Night. The youth pastor coordinated everything himself, with the help of the youth, from song leaders to ushering to testimonials. He’d been preparing for this all week, along with doting on his new daughter.
His wife and daughter didn’t make it to the morning service, to the disappointment of countless members of the church eager to play temporary babysitter. We were told not to expect them that night either; which made it a big deal when the duo arrived just before service started.
The look on the youth pastor’s face as he looked down from the platform showed he was as surprised as anyone else. The pastor later explained his daughter wanted to surprise her husband and that he’d delighted in keeping it from his son-in-law. The baby elicited many “aw…”s and requests to hold the baby.
After the service, I was waiting for my ride when I heard crying come from the youth pastor’s office. Walking by, I saw the tired child was worn out and wanting to let her discomfort be known.
Looking across the foyer, I saw the male half of a young couple who married just before I came to this church. We joke back and forth, compare college schedules, and make trade comments about the opposite sex from time to time. It’s all good fun in the “you know what I mean” vein.
Cocking my head toward the office, and the origin of the wails, I said, “At least you don’t have to worry about that for a while.”
“The cries? Nope. Not for another nine months or so.”
In journalism, I have been taught to keep a straight face when an unexpected piece of information comes your way. The idea is that sources may tell you more if they assume you’re already in the know. This is a tact I’ve used in other cases concerning gossip, to my advantage.
Here, however, I admit I was simply struck silent as he went, “Well, I suppose it would be closer to eights and a half months.”
After a quick biofeedback check to make sure my mouth wasn’t hanging open, which it wasn’t, fortunately, I joked about hitting the stopwatch and counting down to the final delivery day.
“Can you imagine looking at the clock in the delivery room. ‘Ten seconds, honey. Nine, eight…two, one!’ ‘WAAH!’”
This got him to laugh and there was a short pause. Then he said, “Did you know we were having a baby?”
“Um, nope,” I admitted quickly. “I was just joking around. It’s pretty impressive how much out of the loop I usually am.”
We talked about how ignorant we were of the things going on, and how our significant others were the main ones who kept up informed.
“When did those two start going out? Really? Married already? When did I miss that?”
Then, we briefly talked about the embarrassment of inadvertently poking fun at a person.
“At least you weren’t joking about cancer or anything,” he offered.
True, I thought. But then I shared the story of joking about flashing lights and narcolepsy in front of a person who suffered from that affliction.
“Wow, that was sixth grade and I still remember it vividly,” I said shaking my head.
At that point, his wife collected him to move on. I congratulated him on the new developments and softly swore to myself I needed to be more careful about such things in the future.
Granted, this is something that I’m doomed to repeat. I’m sure I’ll play both sides of the spectrum: the ignorant jokesters and the unintended subject.
Here’s hoping that I pull it off with as much grace and kindness as the newly expecting father – though I hope just as strongly that it is many years before I find myself in his shoes (both for my personal sake and my mother’s blood pressure. [Keep breathing, Mom! It’s all hypothetical]).
'Am_I_in_the_loop__No__Just_loopy'
